Along the road
Your steps may stumble
Your thoughts may start to stray
But through it all a heart held humble
Levels and lights your way
(Daniel Fogelberg--Along The Road)
Two weeks passed without incident. Magnus decided Justine needed time to adjust to having her memory fully restored and he needed time to think of a way to train her. The adjustment time was easy; it was thinking of a way to train her that was a bit more difficult.
The improvements in Justine were nothing short of amazing. Now that it was known what she could do, and no one in the mansion was condemning her for it, a great mental burden was removed. She still acted more like a young teenager than an adult and she often fell into periods of silence, but her general attitude was stronger, more confident. She walked taller now and didn't automatically look frightened when someone talked to her.
She spent a lot of time outdoors as if she could never get enough of it. If she wasn't studying or helping around the mansion with the everyday choirs, she was out exploring the grounds. Kitty and Illyana teased her that if she continued, she'd soon know the woods as well as Logan. Justine found she enjoyed being teased; it made her feel normal.
Magnus was glad to see Justine improving, but he still worried about training her. Her description of raising Victor convinced her she'd done something to him, but he wasn't quite sure if it was really raising someone from the dead. The problem was how do you test something like that? Surprisingly enough, it was Dani and Kitty who helped him come up with a solution.
Magnus and Kitty were in the library. Kitty was doing some research for a history paper and Magnus was looking for a book when Dani came in, holding a rather withered plant in her hands. Kitty looked up when she entered. "Uh, nice plant Dani.. what was it?"
"An African Violet," Dani said sadly. "It's Rahne's. She asked me if I could help nurse it back to health and I brought it in here because the light is better."
Both Kitty and Magnus looked at the plant. The leaves were brown, withered, and dry, hanging over the pot. "Uh, Dani, I think Rahne asked you a couple months too late," Kitty said, looking from the plant to the girl.
"Yeah, I think you're right." Dani studied the plant carefully. "Rahne doesn't seem to have a green thumb when it comes to African Violets. She's going to be disappointed." She paused, frowning, brushing her finger along one of the leaves. "But nothing can be done I suppose."
"Maybe you can have Justine bring it back?" Kitty grinned. The, realizing what she'd said, she looked over at Magnus with a guilty smile. "I'm sorry, that was mean."
"I understand," Magnus said slowly. He knew Kitty meant it as a joke, but it got him thinking. He looked at Dani. "Would you mind if I took this?" He pointed to the plant.
"Uh... no I don't mind," Dani said, her brows furrowed. "I don't see why but..."
Kitty's eyes widened. "You're going to do it aren't you?" she said softly. "You're going to see if Justine can bring it back." She gulped.
Magnus didn't answer. He held the plant up, looking at it carefully, then looked at Dani. "There's a chance Rahne might not be disappointed after all." Forgetting all about the book he'd come in for; he turned and left the room.
He found Justine sitting in the grass, looking over the back yard. When she saw him coming towards her, she smiled. "Hi Magnus." She waved and motioned him over.
"Hello Justine," He walked over, still holding the plant. "Am I disturbing you?"
She shook her head. "You can't disturb me Magnus. I like you too much." She patted the ground next to her.
He quirked a brow at her, "I like you" comment, but did not say anything about it. Instead he sat down next to her. "Justine, may I ask you a question?"
"Sure, shoot." She twisted around, looking at him.
He held up the African Violet. "I know you haven't really explored your ability, but do you think it could work on this?"
Her eyes widened as she reached out and took the pot from him. "Uh... I don't know." She frowned, brushing her fingers along the gold foil covering the pot. Tipping her head to one side, she looked at him. "I don't have any idea it would work on a plant. I-I never really thought about it."
"There's only one way to find out." His eyes locked with hers. "Are you willing to try?"
She drew in a deep breath. "I-I'm not sure... but if you think I should... I'll do it." She pulled her gaze away from his, looking around the grounds. "Uh.. want me to try here?"
"If you feel comfortable. If you'd rather go inside, we can do that."
"No." She shook her head. "Here is fine."
She held the plant in both hands, studying it, brushing one finger along a broad leaf. "It's dead all right," she whispered. "I can feel it."
"How?"
"Plants aren't like people," she said softly. "When a plant dies, it doesn't stiffen up right away. Sometimes a plant can look dead, but it's really alive. the roots are still alive. But this plant is dead. I-I can just tell by touching it."
Interesting, he thought. Does she have a way to detect life and death? Or does she know something about plants? "How can you tell by touching it?"
She bit her lower lip. "I can't explain it, it's just touching it.. it's like there isn't.. an energy it's suppose to have." She looked up at him. "Do I sound nuts?"
He smiled. "No, not at all."
She reached down, touching a small patch of brown grass on the lawn. "It's like this... looks dead, but when I touch it, there is something.. right about it. It's hurting, but it just needs something. When I touch the plant.." She paused to hold up the pot. "The right is missing. It feels wrong.. it feels empty."
"Whenever you touch something living, do you feel this.. 'rightness' about it?" he asked.
"Yeah, I do," she answered thoughtfully. "I never really thought about it, because.. well, who thinks if something is right or not? It's only when it feels wrong that you wonder. Also, it's not like I've been touching a lot of living things in the last several years." Her lips twisted into a wry grin. "Man made stuff... well, inanimate stuff.. objects... they don't have anything and that's pretty much what was in the basement. Except for Toby."
Her grin faded and she looked away from him. He knew Toby was a sensitive subject with her already and said nothing. A minute or so later, she turned and looked at him. "Well, lemme see what I can do for this plant," she said, briskly changing the subject. "I suppose you want to watch me huh?"
"Yes." He nodded. "I think it's important that I see what you do."
She gave a nervous little grin. "Okay, here goes nothing." She put the pot down on the ground in front of her and shifted so she was on her knees. She stared at the plant, focusing on it carefully.
As carefully as she watched the plant, Magnus watched Justine. He saw her eyes narrow; her gaze fixed on the plant. It was obvious she concentrated all her effort onto this. She reached out and touched the plant again, a light sweat breaking out on her forehead.
After several minutes of nothing, her shoulders slumped and she looked at Magnus. "Nothing. I-I thought I felt something start, but it.. disappeared."
"I think you're trying too hard," Magnus told her. "Did you have to concentrate that much when you brought Victor back?"
She shook her head. "No... I mean, I got this feeling that I could do something and I just...did it."
"That's what I thought." Magnus nodded. "Try it again, but don't think about it so hard. Quite often these things work best if you just relax and let it happen."
"Whatever you say Magnus." She shrugged and straightened her shoulders; fixing her gaze again on the plant. She tried to keep his advice fixed in her mind and relaxed, taking a deep breath.
Magnus watched as her eyes started to narrow, and eventually close. For two or three minutes nothing happened, then he saw a soft, pale glow start forming around her hands. It was as if there was something in the air she called upon and it gathered to her hands. It was a... clear glow, with maybe a hint of green and white to it, and it seemed to shimmer in the air. He looked up at her face; the color was drained from it, her forehead wet with perspiration, but there were no tension lines in her face. It was as if another part of her was in control, a part she wasn't aware of.
She moved her hands over the plant and the glow began to shift, taking on the funnel shape she'd describe with Victor. The entire thing was about eight inches high and six inches across at the top. The tip hovered over the center of the pot and slowly began to sink in, disappearing into the earth.
When the glow completely disappeared into the plant, she opened her eyes and reached out, touching one of the leaves that still looked dry and withered. "It's alive again," she murmured softly.
He studied the plant, noticing it looked much like it had before. "Are you certain?"
She nodded, wiping her forehead. "It feels right again. It needs water and care, but it's alive. I don't know much about plants but the roots probably look healthy now. The leaves may fall off, but the plant doesn't need those to survive. It'll grow new ones." She struggled to her feet. "I'm going to go lay down."
He looked up at her. "Are you all right?"
She shook her head; the color still hadn't returned to her face and she looked drained. "I've got a headache and I'm tired." She saw the concern on his face and smiled weakly. "It'll be okay. I just need to rest. I'm not used to doing this."
"Do you need help getting back inside?"
She shook her head. "No, I can make it myself."
He watched as she made her way back. She walked slowly, but she wasn't staggering. When she was back in the house he picked up the plant, studying it.
With the proper care, Rahne's plant thrived.
Testing on Justine proceeded at a very slow pace. Every time she used her ability, it exhausted her and she had to rest. Magnus wondered what effort it must have taken her to bring Victor back for her first time. It wasn't surprising that she didn't remember much of what happened right after that when just bringing back a simple plant was enough to send her to lie down for two hours.
From just using plants, he was able to determine some things about Justine's powers. She could bring things back to the point they were when they died. She could do a minor amount of regeneration, but if the damage was extensive, anything she brought back would just die again. It was lucky, for Victor, that he'd only drown. If there had been extensive damage to his body, she might have been able to bring him back, but most likely he would have died again.
As she practiced, it seemed that it came easier to her and her skill grew, but the draining of her energy didn't stop. They discovered she could bring plants back without touching them; she could even be in another room. It did help her to see the plant first, and to touch it, to get a feel for it before she brought it back. There did seem to be a distance factor involved too. The further away she was from the "dead" object, the harder it was for her to bring it back.
"Tell me honestly Magnus," Justine asked him one day as they were working. "Do you see any use under heaven for what I can do?"
Magnus looked at her. "Honestly? No. If you fell into the wrong hands, there could be serious trouble."
"What do you mean?" she asked, head tipped to one side. "I'm evil remember?" Her lips moved forming a quirky grin.
"Jericho thought you were evil," he corrected her gently. "That's one place. There are others who might think you weren't the anti-Christ, but just the opposite. But even that isn't what I refer to. Imagine a situation where the wrong person got a hold of someone who could bring him or his partners back from the dead?"
She sucked in her lower lip. "No more fear of death," she whispered softly. "Willing to take any risk, knowing the worst thing that could happen is they'd be dead and brought back."
"Exactly."
She shivered. "Why do I have to be so dangerous? Why can't I do something useful and-and neat, like, oh, I dunno.... shoot lightning bolts from my fingers?"
Magnus chuckled. "A power like that can be dangerous if not trained properly."
"But at least it's useful!" she protested. "At least it's something I wouldn't have to keep a secret. " She frowned, but there was a faint glimmer in her eyes. "Whoever said life isn't fair was right."
"True enough," Magnus agreed. "Now, how about we get to work?"
"Can we skip it today?" Justine asked. "I mean, I don't mind, but I'm going out later and I'd rather not be tired."
"Oh?" He looked at her. "Where are you going?"
She smiled. "To New York City. There's a concert in Central Park tonight. Kitty, Peter and Kurt are going. Kurt asked me if I wanted to go along and round it out to a foursome." She twined her fingers together, shifting from foot to foot. "It's no big deal, just a concert, but I did agree to go and I think it would be rude to be exhausted and fall asleep. I'll make it up to you Magnus, honest. We can train on Saturday if you're free."
"It's all right," Magnus said. "You're allowed to go out Justine, and I understand that you don't want to be tired. So what concert will you be attending?"
She shrugged. "Uh.. some guy who plays stuff on the organ." She blushed. "Not really my music, but I figure I oughta expose myself to other stuff."
"And 'some guy playing stuff on the organ' seems like a good place to start, right?" His eyes glittered faintly.
She blushed and chuckled. "Yeah, well, you gotta start somewhere don't you?" She looked at him. "Do you want to come along? I'm sure no one will mind and I'll bet you actually like that sort of music."
He shook his head. "No, I don't think that's a good idea."
She frowned. "Too bad. I'd love to have you come along."
"Why?" He looked at her, puzzled.
"Because I like you," She said, rolling her eyes. "How many times do I have to tell you that? I like you, and when you like someone, you want to enjoy their company."
"I don't understand that either," he confessed. "I've pushed you Justine. I've pushed you hard at this and at your other studies. I've given you more headaches and more aggravation than anyone else in the mansion, yet you persist in liking me. Other people wouldn't be so kind in their feelings."
"Yeah, but you.. saved me Magnus," she explained. "You got me out of that basement when nobody else even cared. As for the working me so hard.. it's because you actually give a damned about me." She looked up at him and smiled. "That.. that means a lot to me. I-I spent too much time thinking I just didn't matter at all to anyone. Th-that I never should have been born."
"It's my job to help mutants," Magnus said. "You were suffering unnecessarily, I had to help."
She squinted and frowned. "Quit trying to make excuses. I like you Magnus. You're stuck with it. Would you rather I hated you?"
"No, I don't want you to hate me." He allowed himself a small smile. He looked over at the clock on the wall. "Well, since we're not going to practice today, I think I'll use the time to attend to some other business."
"Anything I can help you with?" she asked, smiling hopefully.
"No. Take the afternoon and enjoy yourself," he suggested.
She shrugged. "If you insist." She started towards the door, then stopped, turning back to look at him. "I still wish you were coming along with us tonight."
Before he could answer, she left the room.
"Kurt, can I talk to you?"
Nightcrawler let go of the ceiling bar and dropped down to his feet. "Sure." Looking up to the control area of the danger room he nodded to Peter and called out, "End program." He reached for a towel hanging on a hook and wiped his face with it.
"I wasn't disturbing you was I?" Magnus asked. The door to the danger room wasn't locked."
Nein," Kurt shook his head. "Just running through an agility program. I didn't lock the door because there really was no danger." He draped the towel around his neck. "I was almost finished anyway, so you aren't disturbing me. What did you need to talk to me about?"
"I heard from Justine that you're planning a trip to the city tonight," Magnus began.
Kurt nodded. "A concert in Central Park. It's a young composer from Europe on his first United States tour."
"Do you think it's a good idea to bring Justine?" Magnus asked.
Kurt looked at him, his brows furrowing in puzzlement. "Why not?" he asked.
"Because of who Justine is, what she can do," Magnus explained. "She's hardly used to the outside world."
"Well, isn't this a good way to start exposing her to it?" Kurt asked. "She'll be with Kitty, Peter, and myself. You know we'll watch out for her. "
"Yes, I'm aware of that, but a concert in the park is likely to be crowded. I don't know how well she'll handle it. Also, considering what she can do..."
"Do you really think there's going to be anyone at the concert Justine's going to want to bring back from the dead?" Kurt asked, tipping his head to one side and studying Magnus carefully. "Think about it for a moment, mein freund; dead people don't usually go to concerts."
"I know that," Magnus protested, scowling. Why wasn't this conversation going the way he wanted it to? "I'm just worried.. she's vulnerable right now. I don't want to see her get in trouble."
Kurt's eyes narrowed as he looked at Magnus. "Is that the reason or is it something else? Perhaps you don't like the idea that it's four of us.. Kitty and Peter, Justine and myself. Maybe you don't like the fact that it looks almost like a double date eh?"
"I don't know what you're talking about." Magnus' scowl deepened.
"Oh?" Kurt quirked a brow. "You've spent a lot of time with Justine since she's been here. More time than anyone else has. Maybe you've started to care about her a little deeper than you'd like to admit."
"Kurt!" A shocked look crossed Magnus' face. "I don't know where you got this idea from, but I assure you, it isn't true. The only feelings I have for Justine are concern for her condition and a desire to help her control her ability. Emotionally she's still a child!"
"Caring about her doesn't mean you have to have the hots for her." Kurt pointed out, still fixing his gaze on Magnus'. "Love comes in many forms. Perhaps it's a father-daughter type concern... "
Magnus shook his head. "You're reading too much into this Kurt" he interrupted. "I'm only working with Justine so much because she needs the most help. I do care, but I would hardly call it love. I'm her teacher and the headmaster of this school. It would hardly be proper for me to 'love' one of my students."
"Uh huh." Kurt looked at him with skepticism, shaking his head. "Funny thing about love Magnus.. it doesn't give a damn about what's proper or not."
Before Magnus could answer, he headed for the door. Just before Kurt exited, he turned back and looked at him. "If it sets your mind to rest, I'm sure Kitty, Peter and I will keep a close eye on Justine tonight. You don't have to worry. And, my feelings for Justine are purely ones of friendship."
"I wasn't implying there was anything wrong with Justine going with you!" Magnus protested. "I think it's a good idea for her to have friends."
"Ya?" Kurt snorted. "You're coming across like a father when you talk about her Magnus. Maybe you wouldn't mind your surrogate daughter being friends with me, but would you really want her to marry me?"
"You're twisting things around!" Magnus sputtered.
"Or maybe I'm just seeing them from another side," Kurt countered. "Just think about it Magnus. You might be surprise at what you discover." With that, he left the room.
It was late that night, after the concert when Magnus saw Justine again. He had spent most of the day and evening in Charles' study, almost reluctantly thinking of his conversation with Kurt.
He didn't want to admit it, but Kurt had brought up a valid point; he did care for Justine and it was rapidly becoming more than it should be. She wasn't the first person in the mansion he'd worked with closely; Illyana had needed his help before. He'd grown close to her, but even Illyana hadn't been so.. vulnerable.
There is something about Justine that affects me, he thought. Her power is.. frightening;. dangerous even. I don't know if I can judge the people of Jericho so harshly for what they did. I would never lock a mutant away, no matter what their power was, but it's obvious something needed to be done. I know what it is like to have an onerous power. I've seen the fear in peoples' eyes when they realize whom they are dealing with. And, I can understand their fear.
On the other side, Justine didn't ask for this power. It was given to her without her choice. In truth, Justine isn't cut out for this. She doesn't have the personality to handle such an ability. She's basically a nice person, who, if she hadn't been a mutant, would have probably married a local boy, raised children, and lived a completely contented, low-key life. Life did a gross injustice to her, yet she doesn't spend time bemoaning her fate. Perhaps that is what draws me to her. It doesn't help that she's so...open in her affection towards me. I understand her reasons behind it, but it isn't easy being the "savior."
"Magnus?"
He looked up to see the focus of all his thoughts poking her head in the door. "I'm sorry, I knocked and you didn't answer," she explained hastily, opening the door a little wider. "I saw the light under the door and thought maybe you'd left the room without turning off the light. I was going to turn it off for you. I-I didn't mean to disturb you."
"It's all right," he assured her. "I was... lost in thought. That's why I didn't hear your knock."
"Oh well then, if I'm disturbing you..."
She looked so much like a child caught with her hand in the cookie jar that he had to smile and shake his head. "You're not disturbing me at all Justine, won't you come in?"
She smiled, walking into the room and sitting down in one of the chairs across the desk from him. "So, what were you thinking about?" she asked, tipping her head to one side and looking at him carefully.
"Nothing important," he said, dismissing his thoughts casually. The last thing he wanted to do was to inform her of what he'd been pondering this night. "So, did you have a good time tonight?" he asked, changing the subject.
She nodded, her eyes sparkling. "Yes, I did!" she exclaimed, sounding almost shocked. "I didn't think I would, I mean, I don't understand that type of music, but I didn't have to! All I had to do was close my eyes and listen.. and soon.. it was like I wasn't just listening, I was... feeling the music. It wonderful!"
He smiled, unable to resist her infectious enthusiasm. "I'm glad to hear you enjoyed yourself. Am I looking at a new classical music aficionado?"
She shrugged. "I don't know if I'd go that far. I still like the music from the seventies and stuff... but I'm a little more willing to give other types of music a chance."
"Did Kitty, Peter and Kurt have a good time also?" he inquired.
She nodded. "I think so. They seemed to be enjoying themselves. To tell you the truth, I was too lost in the music to study them and see what they were feeling, but on the way home they all pretty much said they liked it, so I guess they did."
There was nothing in her tone or words that implied there was anything more than four friends enjoying an evening of music together. Much to Magnus' unease, he realized there was a part of him that was glad of this. Kurt's words echoed in his head; "but would you really want her to marry me?"
"Magnus are you okay?" Justine asked, her expression changing to one of concern. "You suddenly looked... bothered by something."
Perceptive aren't you? he thought, forcing himself to smile. "No, I'm all right." He looked over at the clock. "But it is rather late. Perhaps you should be thinking of going to bed."
She stood, realizing his words were a politely phrased dismissal. "Yeah, you're right." She smiled warmly. "I really wish you would have come with us tonight, I think you would have enjoyed yourself."
"Perhaps," he said, not committing himself one way or the other. "Good night Justine. I will see you in the morning."
"Good night Magnus." She turned for the door, twisting the knob in her hand. "Sleep well."
"You too, Justine."