C'est la vie
(C'est la vie)
That's just the way it goes.
(That's right)
Sometimes.
"Dr. McCoy? It's Magnus."
"Yes?" The voice on the other end of the phone line sounded slightly hesitant and unsure. "What can I do for you today?"
There are days when I think no matter what I do, the X-men will never trust me, Magnus thought, almost sadly. It was something he had to accept and truthfully, it didn't even surprise him, but it didn't make it easier when he had to deal with any of them. "I hope I'm not disturbing you. I'd like to speak to you about Justine Miller, if you have a moment."
"Certainly." Hank's tone warmed up slightly, now that he knew the reason for the call. He knew a fair deal about Justine, Magnus kept him updated on her. Even though he'd only met the girl once, when she'd first arrived at the mansion, he liked her. She seemed like a very nice young woman with some unusual powers. "Is something wrong? Is she all right?"
"She's.... all right," Magnus said hesitantly. "At least as far as I know. She's asleep right now. There was... an incident here last night."
"Oh? Why don't you tell me about it?" Hank asked softly.
Magnus filled him in on the details he knew from Justine's little talk with Scott Summer the night before. When he finished, he could hear Hank suck in his breath with a sharp whistle. "Scott did that? Scott Summers? Forgive me Magnus, but I find that notion quite laborious to comprehend. I'm not saying you are incorrect, but still... Scott Summers?"
"Yes," Magnus sighed. "According to Logan, both he and Scott had more than a few drinks last night, which I think may have clouded his reason. But..." His voice trailed off.
"But that doesn't necessarily make it any simpler for Justine," Hank finished for him. This girl has gotten inside, Hank thought. Further inside than Magnus is even aware. He found the idea of Magnus getting overly involved with Justine amusing. Magnus had always been strong; so good at hiding his feelings and Justine could often be described as an emotional mess.
"No, it doesn't." Magnus said. "Can I be perfectly honest with you?"
"Of course."
Magnus drew in a deep breath. "Justine can't handle her ability..."
"Justine can't? Or the world can't handled Justine?" Hank interrupted.
"Both," Magnus said. "But changing the world to accommodate Justine isn't likely to happen. You've studied her... you know as much about her ability and how it works as I do. Is there anything we can do to... eradicate it?"
There was a long pause. Magnus didn't know if Hank was startled or just thinking. "Remove Justine's ability unconditionally?" Hank finally said, softly, evenly. "Were you thinking, perhaps of surgery? Isolate the portion of her brain that controls the ability and extract it?"
"If that's what it takes."
Another long pause. "That is not a commendable idea. Her mutant ability is not controlled by one separate section. Magnus, please remember, I clarified to you earlier, when I first examine Justine, before we even knew what it was she could do, that I had no inkling as to what I was dealing with. Even now, with the knowledge that she brings people back from the dead, I am still baffled at how she does it. I've examined her medical files thoroughly. The only conclusion I can make is that her... ability works a bit like Illyana's armor. Nobody knows exactly where it comes from, it just appears as she needs it. Somehow, Justine is able to call a person's life-force back from... wherever, and put it back into the body, as well as restore the body to it's former state. Nobody knows where or how she calls on this force, she just does it. The only way I could guarantee Justine would be thoroughly unable to use her ability is to extract enough of her mind that she would be unable activate her ability... In other words, I'd have to practically destroy her mind, turn her into a vegetable. And I refuse to do that."
"I wouldn't expect you to!" Magnus said, sounding a bit more horrified than he wanted. "I'd sooner see her dead." He drew in a deep breath. "What about something to inhibit her ability?"
"Like the collars?" Hank asked. "A possibility, but I see drawbacks. First off, if it was any sort of external device, it could be removed. Even if I designed it so that the only way it could be removed would mean to risk death to Justine, that doesn't mean someone wouldn't attempt it. Second, I would have to design something that would affect several areas of her brain. That would lead us to the same problem we have with surgery; how much of Justine's mental functioning would have to be affected to shut down her ability? Now, we could start by designing something that would be, what I felt was minimal control, but then how do we test it? Have her try to bring things back to life? And, of course, Justine might develop an immunity and learn to override-"
"Cut to the chase Hank, are you basically saying it's hopeless? That in order for Justine to be Justine, she must have this ability of hers as well?"
"At this point, with all I know, yes," Hank admitted. "Have you spoken with Dr. MacTaggert? She might-"
"I spoke with her before I spoke with you," Magnus interrupted again. He did admire, perhaps even like Dr. McCoy, but he did have a tendency to take ear-bending to an art form. "She pretty much said the same things you are." He drew in a deep breath. "I was hoping you might have other options."
"I'm sorry," Hank said softly. "I wish I could help you further. I do promise to persevere in looking into this. Perhaps I could come up to the mansion and examine Justine again sometime in the near future. There is a possibility that I might find something I've neglected that would help with this problem."
"You're always welcome here," Magnus assured him. "And perhaps you're right, with the equipment here..." Before he could finish his sentence, he looked up and saw Justine standing in the doorway to the study. From the look on her face, he could tell she'd been listening outside the door for a while. He nodded and smiled to her, motioning to a chair, then turned his attention back to the phone. "Dr. McCoy, can I call you back later to continue this discussion? Justine just walked into the room."
Hank agreed that Magnus could call him back when it was more convenient. Magnus hung up the phone, looking at Justine. "Hello."
She sat down in the chair, her shoulder's slumped, her hair falling into her eyes. "Hello Magnus."
Magnus decided to get right to the point. "I gather you were eavesdropping outside the door."
She pushed her hair off her shoulders so her face was visible. "Yeah. I overheard."
"So what bothers you?" Magnus asked. "That I was discussing you without your knowledge? Or that I was discussing eliminating your power?"
"Neither really," Justine confessed. "I know you must talk about me to other people." She shrugged. "And I can't really say I'm upset about your wanting to get rid of my... mutant ability I... I wouldn't mind being rid of it myself. What bothers me..." she paused, trying to collect her thoughts. Magnus waited patiently. He knew she would find the words eventually, trying to find them for her wouldn't help.
Before Justine could speak, Scott Summers poked his head in the doorway. "Magnus?" He looked around, seeing Justine in the chair. "Justine? You're here too? Good. I-I wanted to speak to both of you, if it's all right..."
Magnus opened his mouth to tell Scott it was not all right, and to leave, but Justine spoke first. "About what?" she asked, looking at Scott with wide eyes.
Scott turned and looked at her. His posture was stiff, formal. It was obvious he was uncomfortable. "I-I just wanted to say I'm sorry for my behavior last night. I-It was inexcusable."
That seems like the least you can say, Magnus thought.
"I know I don't deserve it, Justine," Scott continued, "but do you think you could find it in yourself to forgive me? I promise, I'll never ask you to use your ability again."
You're damned right you won't, Magnus thought. He waited to see what Justine would say. He wouldn't blame her if she told him off, but he doubted she would. It just wasn't in her nature.
"It's all right, I forgive you," Justine said softly. "A-actually, part of me feels I ought to thank you,"
"Thank me?" Scott asked. Both men looked at her with expressions of disbelief.
Justine nodded. "Yeah. After I went back to bed last night... I couldn't sleep, so I just looked out the window and thought about... stuff. And I realized something..." She paused, her brow furrowing.
"What was that?" Magnus urged her gently.
She looked up at Magnus, over to Scott, and back to Magnus again. "Wh-when my parents first locked me in the basement, I-I didn't understand why they could do such a thing to me. I-I figured it was because I was evil... but, maybe that wasn't the real reason. Maybe they even thought it was the real reason, but it really wasn't...."
"What do you mean?" Magnus asked.
She fixed her gaze on him steadily. "Maybe... rather than protecting themselves from me... maybe they were really trying to protect me from them." She rose from her chair and walked out of the room with no further explanation.
Scott and Magnus both watched her leave, making no effort to stop her. "She's kind of strange isn't she?" Scott asked, more of an effort to start a conversation.
Magnus looked at him, his eyes narrowing. "If you'd lived through what she has lived through, I think you'd be a little strange yourself Scott. And, I'm sure you didn't help last night, trying to convince her to use her ability when it's been drilled into her head by everyone here that it's wrong."
Scott's shoulders slumped. "I apologized for that," he began, only to be interrupted.
"Yes, you did. Very admirable of you. And, as I'm sure you expected, Justine forgave you." Magnus' voice was cold and steady. "I, however am not that forgiving. I'm still upset with you about what happened."
"I know it was wrong," Scott protested, looking up at him, behind the red glasses. "I know I was a little... drunk, but that doesn't excuse what I did. I've admitted to it. I've been under a lot of stress and I guess I cracked. What more can I say? I can't turn back time and take the incident away now, can I?"
"No, Mr. Summers, unfortunately you can't," Magnus retorted. "And just as you cannot turn back time, I cannot just shrug it off and say 'it's over and done.' What you did was mean and selfish. Did you even look at her as you were leading her from the room? She was on the verge of hysteria, yet you just ignored it. You were so intent on getting her to do what you wanted..." He paused, shaking his head. "How many times have I been lectured by the X-men for trying to manipulate people? For trying to bend them to do my bidding? Now you come along... you who used to be one of the worst at pointing out my wrongs, and do exactly the same thing. Drunk, stressed out or not, I don't care, it's no excuse. At least I would have stopped before driving someone to the point you had Justine at last night."
Scott's shoulders straightened. "Excuse me, but what I did last night is hardly comparable to the things you've done in your past Magnus. I've admitted I was wrong, I'm willing to do whatever I can to set it right again. I don't think you feel any regret for anything you've ever done in your life."
"Oh, you'd be surprised at how many regrets I have, Mr. Summers."
"Well, you do a darned fine job of hiding them," Scott retorted. "I came in here to try to talk to you about this, see if there was anything I can do, but obviously that was a bad idea. I'm leaving Magnus." He turned to leave, then paused, looking over his shoulder at Magnus. "I don't understand for the life of me why Charles put you in charge. You can be in charge of the mansion, but you'll never take his place. As long as you're here, there is no place for me with the X-men and there never will be. I won't be coming back."
Magnus looked at him. "Then I only have one thing to say, Scott..."
"What's that?"
"Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out."