After a few awkward moments, we finally got to the point where we could converse. I found myself sitting Indian style on a corner of his bed, he sat on a chair across the room. Everyone at the school knew about the attack on Jono by Onslaught and how Ange tried to get him to Westchester. However, neither one had offered any information on how they got from their to Los Angeles, so that's where he started.

Chamber told me that the two of them had been attacked by the X-Cutioner, a name I vaguely remembered from our school work, and Angelo had gotten Jono to safety. The description was void of details, whether this came from an unwillingness to talk on Jono's part, or because he didn't remember much of what happened, I don't know. I asked him why the X-Cutioner had attacked.

He shrugged, ("Som'thin 'bout a murder.") Even though I knew more than I did before, I now had more questions than answers. A murder? That ~could~ fit with the fact that Ange's family thought he had been murdered. But why would that involve someone as "big time" as the X- Cutioner?

("So,") I began. ("Why did...")

("I don't know,") he said cutting me off. ("Honestly. Angelo won't talk about it.")

("Well, then, what about Los Angeles?") Then I added, ("He has told me some things; about his family thinking he had been murdered. But apparently, that isn't a new issue. Sean and Emma have known it since he came to the school.")

("I...if yer hadn't know that much, I would 'ave told yer. But anymore? It's not my place, gel. I think yer should know, really. But it's should be b'tween the two of yerselves. Not me.")

Then I said, "Well you..." I paused, wondering if anyone had heard me. I spoke again, this time telepathically. ("Well you haven't told me much at all! Look, I don't want you to betray his trust or anything, but I know he didn't go all the way to LA just to check on his mom. There's more, I know there is, I can tell it in his voice.")

The room, as it had been all night, was silent. With vocal speech, you can hear a pause or the hesitance in someone's voice. You can hear the soft noises they make: working their jaw, swallowing, taking a breath. But here, where the conversation takes place entirely in one's mind, no such noises can be heard. Instead there is a presence in my mind, almost like a "white noise". It felt uneasy...maybe restless. It is something not entirely explainable, I think, it was really Jono's essence. I've known Chamber for a year and a half, and I don't think I ever knew his so well as I did in this moment.

It sounds mystical or something, it's just that I don't have the right words to explain it. It was like our minds were touching, and while neither of us was privy to the others thoughts, there was a feeling of closeness. And looniness, if that makes any sense.

("What is this?") I ask.

("Me.")

I would have asked more, but he returned to our former subject.

("Loik he said, his main purpose for goin' back was ter check on his mom. But there were other things involved. Do yer at least know he was involved with gangs?")

I nodded. ("He would talk about it more, before all of this happened. Just that he was in a bad...volatile situation and was planning on getting out. He said it would have been hard, and he hadn't been sure how he was going to have done it.")

("Exactly. Appar'ntly he was very close to his gang leader and he didn't want 'em to know he was back. He went ter a loter trouble ter make sure that 'e wasn't seen. That's the jist of it, Sunshine, he'll tell yer more eventu'lly.")

Abruptly, any presence I had felt in my mind had vanished. He had closed the method of communication and wasn't going to say anymore on the subject. It was like the silence in a room when you hang up the phone after a long conversation.

I stood up to leave the room when someone knocked on the door.

("It's Angelo,") he said.

I froze in my tracks and briefly envisioned myself jumping out the window or something equally absurd. Jonothan pushed something into my hands as he walked to the door. It was a Pearl Jam CD.

A Pearl Jam CD? What am I...

Jonothan was opening the door and I could hear Ange say something. At about that time my panic center put the pieces together.

"Well, thanks for letting me borrow this," I found myself saying as I walked to the door, the whole time looking down at the case, as if reading the songs. I looked up when I reached the door.

"Hiya." I smiled at Angelo. By now I had a knot in my stomach, I ~really~ didn't want to try and explain my way out of this one, he would be so angry to know I was talkin to Jono about LA. I knew I shouldn't have, curiosity killed the cat and all, but you know how it is.

"I was looking for you," he says, "the computer said you where here." At this point his voice is hesitant, trying to figure out what I'm doing. He flashes a questioning look to Jonothan, but I wasn't going to look for a response.

"Yeah, I came to get this." I held the CD up. "Thanks," I said to Jono as I stepped out the door.

Skin put an arm around me, I'd have to say in a very possessive manner.

"Hasta luego," he says to Jono.

He ushered me down the hall to his room. He stopped with his back to the door and maneuver me so I was in front..

I was trying to figure out if he knew how long I had been in Jono's room. I mean, I didn't do anything wrong, so to anyone seeing the situation, it would seem as though I'm blowing the whole thing out of proportion. It was something entirely inter-personal; the last thing in the world I wanted to do was to hurt my relationship with Angelo, but I also wanted to know what had happened. Not just for the curious George kind of reason, but I was truly worried about him, and I found that he was becoming someone I didn't know as well as I had once thought.

"So....wassup?" I asked, fearing the worst from him.

"On a crazy whim, Jubilee decided she wanted to go swimming; care to join her?"

I breathed a mental sigh of relief. Swimming. Ok, I can handle swimming.

"Sure! In the 'sphere or the pool?" After spending a summer swimmin' in the grotto, I had trouble getting excited over jumping in a concrete hole in the ground. It was so much more fun in the grotto.

"Biosphere."

"Ok, well, I'll go get my suit and I'll see you there."

He kissed me on the cheek. "Ok."

I raised a hand up to his chin and brushed my fingers over the stubble. "Shave tomorrow," I said.

"For Beth?" While he didn't know Beth, per se, he has had some rather lengthy talks with her, but never in person.

"Yeah, right. For Kris."

We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things get worse.

"Shades of Gray" 7/?, by Me. Send comments to monet@uky.campus.mci.net